Ladies, do you have a friend that has just always been there? Or maybe your lucky enough to have more than one? If you have that kindred soul who knows you inside out, who has seen you at your best, worst, happiest, saddest and knows all your weird quirks and is still around then thank your lucky stars. If they’ve stuck around this long, your probably never gonna get rid of them, right? Psychologists have said that if you have had a friendship which has lasted longer than 7 years, then it will last a lifetime.
Picture a 3 year old in her house on a council estate in London in the late 70’s. I’m picturing it too as I have no recollection of it but from what I’m told the older girl that lived down the road came and knocked on my door as she’d seen me with my mum and asked if i could come out to play. Our mums became great friends and so did we. Forty two years later, we are still friends (and so are our mums) and we have travelled through every step of our lives together so far- from both being teen mums, to marrying brothers to now when we are both of an age where our parents are becoming frailer and needing more support.
How did we stay so close? Well Suzanne is kinda like me in many ways. We were both quite quiet (although me more so), we both liked to write stories and play with our girls worlds (remember them?). More importantly though as we grew older we both were forever looking for a purpose, a meaning to life and would always and still do work on bettering ourselves and having the attitude of “Life is short”. We are quite upbeat and positive people and always up for in depth meaning of life discussions but we both have had times where we just want to stay on the surface, be shallow and talk about absolute shite but that’s ok, cos a great friend will adapt to how you are feeling and brings just the right things to the table when you need them.
We are both open to new ideas and ways of life, try not to judge others and try and support our circle as best we can. I can honestly say she is probably the only person in my life I’ve told my deepest darkest secrets too as i know she will listen and give her opinion but wont judge. Suzanne is an incredible person in that sense. She always thinks of others too, reaches out when she thinks someone is not doing well or just because she wants too. She carries out little acts of kindness often and has a huge heart!
The memories we have are so vast now and they help keep us close despite any distance we now have. When you have those shared experiences it doesn’t matter how long its been since you’ve spoken, there is always something to talk about from our childhood: adventures, plans to run away as kids, Victoria plumb stories we wrote, British Bulldog on the green, staying out until dusk, sneaking into the house for biscuits or ice lollies, staying up and watching horror films, holidays together to Blackpool, games of monopoly, learning sign language from my mum, I could go on and on and on……..
They seem like small things but we’ve been friends through every major event in my life too and as we got older there were: break ups, dates, our kids being born, getting married, illness, house moves, losing loved ones – absolutely everything. Her family feels like mine and I couldn’t imagine life without her input.
We have both always enjoyed talking about our “purpose” in life and the book that we both read “Conversations with God” by Neale Donald Walsch as teenagers (i think, or young adults) is what begun many long and deep discussions about the people in our lives and our path, followed by many other books and discussions. I have grown to believe that there are people in our lives that have travelled many lifetimes with us and that will be with us for many more in some sense, helping us to learn and grow each time and I think Suzanne is one of those people for me.
Life is better with a friend beside you and one good friend is so much better than 10 aquaintances. Friendship grows with time and memories made, so no matter how old you are remember to enjoy those girly chats, nights out and pamper sessions because they are where the magic happens, where women come into their own, show their vulnerability and support each other and where friendship that last a lifetime blossom.
Do you have a lifelong friend?
How did you meet?
Share your story in the comments and lets celebrate women’s frienships together…….